The Devil's Dictionary

FUTURE, n. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other aliments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.